I haven’t written in so long. Purely because I didn’t really know where to start and lost my inspiration. Also TV got in the way and Netflix..
So I’ve been fairly busy in terms of acting work which I’m happy about but I’m currently feeling like I’m hitting brick wall with it all really. I’m so low on cash most months that I just about scrape to get by. I’m applying for work on casting websites and getting no where fast. I applied to quite a few agents a couple of months back, to come and see me in what was a very good Shakespeare play only to receive nothing. Not even a ‘you’re crap go away and die in a huge whole.’
I know the industry is hard and I have been told many, many times how difficult it is but I’m losing my inspiration.
On the upside I played Cordelia and The Fool in Bowler Crab’s recent production of King Lear and I had a great time and received a fair bit of excellent feedback for my role as The Fool. I had a great time covered in yellow paint and dancing and prancing all over the stage.
After King Lear was over I was straight into covering Aladdin and playing Abu/Queen Sultana for M&M Theatrical Productions. I didn’t get a chance to go to the King Lear after show party as I was due to catch a train early the next day to perform as a monkey and cockney Queen. (Clearly I do Cockney well..)
I got poorly whilst being on tour, because it wouldn’t be a true tour if all actors didn’t come back home sniffling and coughing all over the place. I’ve had a great Christmas and New Year and now I’m feeling flat again..It’s only the 1st day back!
I’ve set myself a target of applying to 3 casting jobs a day/week if they apply to me and of course if they pay. I need more confidence in myself and I need to big myself up more in terms of what I know I can do and also be realistic in what I actually can’t do.
I will also be looking more into voice work like I promised myself I would do last year but got the fear. I’m going to apply to as many voice castings as I can and currently if they are free at this stage that’s ok too being a little novice in the area.
I also want to try and find myself a permanent job that I can come and go if I need to…I know I just contradicted myself there. As much as temping is ok and it pays the bills (when it wants to!) it isn’t sitting right for me anymore. I don’t want to be the newbie every week, be treated like crap because ‘I’m just the temp’ or on the other hand fall in love with a place and then have to leave because I’m just temporary and cannot stay.
Does anyone know of a job where I can come and go like I need to? Freelance teacher would be good wouldn’t it or my dream job would be a Drama therapist but there isn’t anywhere local to me at this time where I can start training and a huge factor is I don’t have the money.
I suppose I just thought I would be further along then I am at the moment and I’m fine with admitting it but I’m going to try my hardest to change it.